That’s Not What I Thought
There’s a character in a movie that says, “My favorite thing is laughter through tears.”
I’d rather skip the tears, but still, I know what she means. I love a good change-up, too. The movie The Sixth Sense has one of my favorite change-ups. The ending makes you view everything you thought you knew up to that point in a completely different light. That moment when you realize things are not quite what you thought they were, is unique. I can list on one hand the movies that managed to pull off a pirouette with grace. I should resent being intentionally misled by a movie, but there’s something compelling about being immersed in one thing — one emotion or point of view or belief — and then finding out that the real story is completely different than what you thought.
Looking at an old photo of myself recently reminded me of one of my favorite instances of a real-world change-up. In the photo, I’m in Florida on vacation, having fun. But I’m wearing a button-down white blouse with a heavy black cable knit cardigan sweater over it. It’s the same outfit I had worn walking along the beach in the early morning. In my defense, it was chilly out. I wanted to take advantage of my time at the ocean even if it wasn’t swimming weather.
As I walked along the beach, I passed two young women standing in the sand in front of a beach-front condo in their bikinis, their long blonde hair blowing gracefully in the chilly breeze. Not a care in the world.
Idiots, I silently judged.
As I passed, they awkwardly struck up a conversation. I nodded, crossed my arms, and continued trudging past.
“Hey, would you mind taking our picture?”
Oh! I thought. That’s why they’re dressed so inappropriately for the temperature outside.
“Sure,” I said, softening. I reached for their camera.
“No,” she said. “Can we take our picture with you?”
An involuntary laugh escaped me. Feeling humiliated, I shook them off and stomped away.
They made me feel stupid and ugly. After the trip, I confided this to a girlfriend. It galled me that they assumed I was so clueless that I wouldn’t realize they were making fun of the way I looked.
To my surprise, my girlfriend laughed and shook her head.
“No, you have it all wrong. They wanted a picture with you so they could tell their parents that you were the chaperone. They told their parents there would be an adult chaperone on the trip!”
She was right, of course. I really was clueless. But I felt much better once I realized that.
Things can twist ninety degrees and leave you with a completely different view than you had at the start. I just have to remind myself of that when I find myself faced with a situation that is not what I want. Or when other people jump to conclusions about me before they’ve gotten to know me.
